I have never been interested in sports. I would much rather watch a good movie than a football game. I only tune in on Super Bowl Sunday, and that is mainly just to watch the opening ceremony, the half-time show and the commercials. Last week was the first time I actually watched the game. I had to figure out how to arrange the "players" on my sports arena cake. I found that there was more drama in the stadium than there would have been in a movie. The Eagles defeated the Chiefs by a landslide.
Although I was rooting for the Eagles, I found myself feeling sorry for the Chiefs. When it was almost half-time and they still had a score of zero, the devastation and hopelessness could be seen on all of their faces. In spite of trying very hard, they just couldn't make the ball go where they wanted it to go. It was obvious that they weren't feeling very good about themselves, but was that warranted? I know very little about football, but it seems to be common sense that you don't get to be a professional football player in the NFL without being pretty darn good at what you do. Furthermore, how many teams are able to go all the way to the Super Bowl? Isn't it a sign of success just to be there?
In our highly competitive, demanding culture, it can be easy to get the message that our value is based on always being at the top. God forbid that we start to slip.
After failing to get re-elected for a second term, Jimmy Carter left the White House with a great sense of failure. But why? Out of all the billions of people who lived in this country over the past two hundred and fifty years, less than forty seven have ever gotten elected to be president. What hurdles did he have to jump to become president in the first place? How many people's trust did he have to win? What about the things he accomplished while he was there? He had a pivotal role in the release of a notorious group of hostages in Iran. He negotiated a peace agreement between two foreign countries that no one thought would ever put aside their differences.
If you ever want to see someone disappear quickly, just watch the first runner up in a Miss America contest. She has five seconds of fame while she nervously holds hands with the impending Miss America. Her announcement as the first runner up is the only time when winning brings grave disappointment. She graciously embraces the new Miss America and her exit goes unnoticed as a crowd rushes up to crown the winner. But doesn't she deserve better? She was awarded second place in the pageant, meaning that she did better than forty-eight other women, each who were determined to be the best in their state.
Why do we raise the bar so high?
The character, Roseanne Conner, from the popular 90's Sit-com "Roseanne" was one of the few people who got it right in relation to setting standards for the young. The scene from that series that affected me most deeply was the one in which Roseanne talked to her daughter, Darlene, encouraging her to accept a scholarship to go to Arts School. Darlene then asked, "But what if I'm not so good at this college thing? What if I "suck" at it?" Roseanne replied, "Then you'll be the first Conner to ever "suck" at college." I was amazed when I heard that line for the first time. I had never looked at it in that way. At the time, I was a graduate student nervously approaching my internship - the final hurdle before receiving my Master's Degree in Counseling Psychology. It would be my first experience doing "real" counseling with "real" clients. Like Darlene, I was terrified that I would "suck" at it. Roseanne reminded me that just getting that far was an achievement in itself.
As we move along in life, there are things we see and hear that occasionally remind us of the lessons from our youth. The next time I find myself slipping, I will not lose heart, remembering that even great football players can have an "off-game".
Add comment
Comments